Hook Line and Sinker

So if you've been follow this blog for a while you might remember me a year ago worrying about where my life was going and what God was gonna do with me. I was worried about my QLC (quarter life crisis) hitting hard! And let me tell you, i have a major case of the QLC's and its still raging. In my post last year i was whining and complaining (it happens)about my wants/expectations for this last year and how they all seemed to be crashing and burning before my very eyes. But, like always, God acceded them.
Another year of reflecting...
-moved out of the SheShack and into a place in eastvale
-started a couple of cake decorating classes
-june killed my roommates dog
-had a panic attack
-moved back into corona and rented a room from a guy named dick
-had a panic attack
-got ENGAGED
-found out dick was a sketchy dude and moved into my brothers house
-that was a bad idea so i moved into Andrews house
-planned the wedding
-had a more panic attacks
-move into our apartment 
-married my soul mate
-got in a car accident
-got a house
-got a bad leak
-got to see my little brother and sister 3x this year
-needed my family more than ever
-got a lot to be thankful for
-finally found that middle ground with my job and am starting to enjoy it
-but i still got a camera and equip and starting my own company
-lots of self discover. always learning something new about myself.


So ya, that covers about all the criteria for a QLC: Married? Check! House? Check! Career? Almost there, Half Check! 
Every year of my life gets better and more chaotic than the last. Maybe its just this season of life. Maybe its just life. I dont know. I love it though. I pray that it keeps getting to be more more. Ive gotten to that point where as much as i like to think i got it all understood, i know i dont. And accepting that made my mind opened up and ive learned and seen to many new and real things. 
Its that whole i havent changed but i know im not the same thing.
Im still me- just in the process of becoming the best version of me.

BIG IT ON 26!

Happy Birthday Natalie

Last weekend was Natalie (natorii, natsnap, natatatat) 25th birthday!
(shes handling the QLC much better than i am)
on Saturday we put on our ponchos and rubbah boots and went to Disneyland. Haven t been there in months, which felt like forever and had so much fun! the rain had scared all the crowds away and the longest line was like 15mins.

sleeping on tower of terror. except for nat.

amelia and nat lovin on the muppet man

then on sunday night 25+ of us feasted at Lucille's
(check out debi getting into it)



and a close up of (the best looking cupcakes ive ever made) the cupcakes i made for her:


i love natalie. she is one of the most beautiful soul + person ive ever met. loyal to a fault to her family, friends and God. always making you laugh. shes always been there for me since ive known her and im so blessed to have her as one of my closets friends.

300 + the QLC

THIS IS MY 300TH POST!

almost exactly two years ago i started this blog to post pictures and anything i thought my friends and i would find funny. basically twitpic before it existed.
ive tried to always keep this place light hearted and stayed away from the diary style, not to say i don't enjoy reading those, its just not me to do that. and i wanted to stay out of the drama and vulnerability that can occur when you open up about things. buuut, seeing as this is a big milestone and its my blog i thought id update you on myself from then and now. ive been kinda putting this off because ive been having a heavy heart lately and didn't want to sound like i wasn't happy or grateful or COMPLAINING. heaven forbid.

living situation:
i had just moved out of an apt my little brother & i shared (praise the Lord!) and into an apt Brenda and i shared (praise the Lord again!) . it was her first time moving away from her family and our first time living together like that. then after an attempted robbery and coming home to cops breaking into the drunk neighbor's place we moved into what has been dubbed "the sheshack" with Jolene and Heather. but heath got hitched and Linds moved in. and then came June :)

school:
i had just started going back to rcc at night to finish up my general ed and raise my GPA to apply for Chapman. after working full time and going to school full time for a year and half i applied to Chapman university's dodge college for a BA in film production. i got on the waiting list but didn't make it in. mixed emotions about this. i really did want to get in but deep down inside the insecure me i was petrified if i did actually get accepted. my gift for finding the silver lining helped me realize its all good. now i won't be putting myself in huge debt and it won't hold up plans on buying a house and getting married.

work:
i still work for my family's companies. bummed on this. especially as of lately. its so hard to work with your family. but im trying to get out and applying for other jobs elsewhere.

God:
my love and our relationship has grown so much in the past two years. i still have a hard time accepting His grace. i get stuck in the cycle of when i do something bad i want to retreat and stop going to church and talking to Him. i guess i just get ashamed. even when i ask for forgiveness i cant shake that guilty feeling even though i know He has forgotten about it. ill never comprehend His love and grace.

mods:
ive added a few new tattoos and removed a piercing. after seeing this really annoying guy with the same lip piercing as me at the angels game on my birthday last year i removed it the next day. and in April 08 Geoff and i ended up hanging out a whole day together and we got our lips tattooed by Los. Geoff got the word "PRAY" and i got "i [heart] [pic of ice cream cone]". surprisingly mine it still there and legible but Geoff's "P" faded quick and now his says "RAY". i also got the tops of my feet done. its this painting i saw by Lynette may that i fell in love with a while ago. my mom cried and hit my arm when she saw it. she has a love/hate with my tattoos. hates that i did it but loves to show them off to her friends.

love:
oh my love life.... when i first started this i was dating Jonathan. but after a few breakups we realized we were better friends. and to this day he is still one of my good friends. a few months after Jonathan, Geoff and i started talking and quickly fell hard for each other. there was a lot of drama with that. seems everyone else saw it before we did. but we took the high road and kept our mouths shut as not to feed into the gossip and lies. thankfully all that drama has subsided (as it should after we've being together over a year). he'll be home in 5 days! hes been gone for about 2 months and absence has totally made our hearts grow founder (as if they could). and in all honesty, i didn't except to miss him this much! ive never done the long distance thing for this long. wasn't too bad though. just hearing his voice is like seeing him. but i cant wait to have my best friend back in my arms.

QLC:
my birthday is next week and i definitely have a case of the quarter life crisis. (Gabe and Chris, my apologies for making fun of you both when you turned this age and went thru it. and if you didn't know i made fun of you im sorry again for letting you know via this paragraph) i totally want the hubs, the home, and a career. what the hell?! when did i start wanting these huge responsibilities?
ive just been reevaluating everything in my life the past few months and have been trying to move forward but i keep getting slamming doors and No's. basically all my plans and back up plans for this year aren't going to happen. getting into Chapman- denied. buying my own place- gotta save up a lil' more. and finding a new job that ill actually like- harder than i thought. its starting to weight heavy on my confidence. But i know God is faithful and He's got something going on. im just trying to keep my eyes open and my heart ready.

and finally... you guys:
what this first started out i think just Mark and Gabe were the only ones reading this but it quickly became many more people. some of you i haven't had the pleasure of meeting yet but hope to someday. and i get a good amount of visitors coming through here whenever i post something new(and man, did you guys REALLLLYYY like that look-a-like post!) and can see where you all are from. from corona to NY to England to Singapore. its crazy and i am humbled. apologies for my bad grammar. but you keep coming back so you must not mind.


so ya, im not a failure, i swear. i am blessed and don't know why. ive got my God, my love, beautiful friends and a roof over my head.
stoked. on. life.