the sweetest remedy

anxiously waiting about everything
with prayer and petition and thanksgiving
You transcend all understanding
putting to rest my heart and mind

Philippians 4:6 just putting me at ease...

the day i lost my voice

"It's sure as the floor 'neath my toes
And somehow not surprised
That I was superimposed, somehow in this life
And if my friends and my foes would just drop me a line, it'd be nice.

You see love is a drink that goes straight to my head
And time is a lover and I'm caught in her stare
And the sentiment there follows me straight to my bed through the night

I've got my life in a suitcase,
I'm ready to run, run, run away..
I've got no time, 'cause I'm always trying to run, run, run away
'Cause everyday in here feels like it's only a game.
I've got my life in a suitcase, a suitcase, a suitcase...

What could be an anchor here, with a storm on the rise,
When you never meant to see so clear, when smoke gets in your eyes
And the men in the moon never makes his replies
Understood

I've got my life in a suitcase,
I'm ready to run, run, run away..
I've got no time, 'cause I'm always trying to run, run, run away
'Cause everyday in here feels like it's only a game.
I've got my life in a suitcase, a suitcase, a suitcase...

For a moment I was one man and the world made sense
For a moment in this storm made of consequence

I've got my life in a suitcase,
I'm ready to run, run, run away..
I've got no time, 'cause I'm always trying to run, run, run away
'Cause everyday in here feels like it's only a game.
I've got my life in a suitcase, a suitcase, a suitcase..."

-copeland

lately this has been my hearts song. but my head reminds me how selfish id be just to take off and i realize it would be in fear ...at this point.

ive worked years to get to the position im at right now. and when i thought i was finally going to get my answer i received an answer far worse than a "yes" or a "no". it was to wait a little longer. see over 1,000 people applied for the school i wanted but they only take somewhere around 30 transfer students. i dont know how it goes really but i wasnt declined from the school. there just wasnt enough room to fit me in anymore i guess when they got to my application. and now, on monday, i will find out if they have a spot for me. now im to the point in my head where im just cussing up a storm of frustration. the semester starts in one month! but seriously, anyone who got into that program would be stupid not to take it. unless they got into UCLA or USC's film school. so im not getting my hopes high on there being a spot for me.

i dont want to sound ungrateful but i really do want to be some where new so badly. i want an adventure. i need to explore.

decisions pending...

i sent in my completed application on February 28th.
i heard back from them a couple times asking for me to resend my letter of recommendation and for my high school transcripts. people told me that them asking for my high school grades is a good thing, but if you knew my high school grades you'd know that its not haha. i wasn't a idiot or anything. just wasn't motivated. not like how i am now which is why the tone of my essays were: please ignore my younger years and see how much i have changed in the past two years...im an A/B student now all while working full time and going to school at night full time.
i just want to know already!

till then, im just sitting in this waiting room.
this whole summer is basically a waiting room for geoff and i. seeing where God takes the band, tour, work, money situations, school, a lot of big decisions this summer... just have to wait and see what God's planned. but im going to have fun till then

starting with memorial day! im so sunburned! just waiting for my mexican half to turn it into a tan because it feels like i am constantly receiving a indian burn all over my body. and i feel like weak sauce for being so sore after a game of softball and kickball. then the festivities continued at the shack with bbq-ing, swimming, karaoke, and games. some priceless video footage will be posted soon. (i finally figured out how to work my video camera with my comp but i really don't like using imovie) seriously, i have amazing friends. i love all of you that came over and hung out. made my day. i was so tired after that long day. up early for a crepe breakfast that jojo prepared for us and then june started ralphing all night :( lets recap everything she ate that weekend that wasnt from her dog bowl:
-3/4 of a cheese pizza from the night before
-pool water
-rope
-cork
-pool water
-raw hamburger meat
-grease
-pool water
-fruit bits
she seems to think the pool is her water bowl.

i know im no music critic but the new sleeping giant is so amazing! i cant stop listening to it. once i understood what he was saying, tommys lyrics are so moving haha. j/p. there's a lot more singing in this one which i love but it still has heavy breakdowns. the over all recording of the album is much better quality than the last one. and its over 45 mins long! cant wait for you guys to listen to the whole thing. beautiful worship. you can pre-order it now too. youll get the cd a few days sooner then the release date and a shirt.

California, you disappoint me. and to the Christians, where is Christ's love in all your discrimation? please show me.

bring your dog to work day

i came home last week to a note on my door saying the gas company has to change our gas meter out and that i needed to leave the side gate unlocked and tie my dog up. for june and my neighbors sake i wasn't about to chain her to the basketball pole again. its too hot outside now and she barks and cries if i do that. so i decided to declare friday Bring Your Dog to Work Day. one of the few perks to working for your family.

as you can tell... june had a rough day.


and then she discovered the fish tank:


she got so excited and she would chase the fishes from one side of the tank to the other, snapping her teeth at them trying to bite them through the glass. shes was so cute.

after work i decided to try out The Paw Spa, a do it yourself dog grooming place in corona. the place is legit with different sized bathtubs and all the things you would ever need to groom. the lady that runs it was really cool and helped me out a ton! see, june is what you would call "dog aggressive". she HATES other dogs and naturally, there were dogs everywhere in that place. she was lunging with her lips up, teeth out, aggressively barking at rots, dobermans, and poodles. it was so embarrassing. the lady even started yelling at june in german which worked for about 15 secs. then she was back losing her cool.
after that i decided to try and introduce her to my moms dog, Jack thru the fence in her back yard. that was a bust. i need the dog whisperer. even classes haven't helped her. she loves people though.

then, to top off the bad dog behavior, i baked a bunch of blueberry muffins for brenda and jojo to sell at their rummage sale on saturday morning. well, after i was done baking them i went up to the church to help them set up and since it was 11:30pm i didn't want to lock june out and have her bark and piss off the neighbors again so i left her in the house. when i came home there was 12 missing and the only ones left were the muffins i left in the cupcake pan.
no paper wrappers to be found.
not a crumb.
only four little june hairs on a cookie sheet.
it was totally my fault for leaving them on the counter where they are easily accessible to her if she stands on her back legs.
pictures are deceiving. shes a pretty large 80lbs and growing.

[end dog rant]

in other non boring to you news:
- i got a postcard from chapman saying that they have my full application and will NOW evaluate it. so i probably wont hear back from them till after the holiday weekend.
- been listening to the new SG album all day today. its so amazing. i cant wait till you hear it for yourselves. (no i wont burn you a copy)
- monday night bike ride tonight if your interested, hit me up

aesthetically pleasing

well, i got bored again and changed the look of my blog.
im going to start posting a new picture in the header every week taken by my friend Ed McGowan. He is the head graphic designer or something really important like that, that i used to work with at plainjoe studios. he has became quite the photographer. check out his flikr. the beautiful model and adorable kids are his wife and kids.

friday is upon us and i am ready for the weekend:
-edit
-h.b. for nicoles bday dinner
-edit
-sleep?
-edit
-submit video application to chapman (alkjdsfh ajfhdsj fh;asjfhsfjsa! <----excited/nervous/anxious
-work
-redlands
-sleep?
-heather bridal showerrrr
-tithemi

...or something like that.